#!/bin/bash
# Bullshit generator
# Version 1.1
# © 2010 Homer, Slated.org
# License: GPL3+
# http://www.gnu.org/licenses/gpl.html

pn1=(I You He She They We Somebody Nobody Everybody It)
mod=(will might should would can could must may)
con=""
vb1=(deliver bring leverage empower refocus revitalize inject strategize evangelize incentivize)
no1=(synergy dynamism agility value buzz expectation confidence vision traction solutions)
pre="to"
vb2=(monetize capitalize grow incrementalize harness engage commoditize productize impact generate)
pn2=(my your his her their our the any all some)
adj=(lateral vertical integral organic grassroot developmental core fringe granular cohesive)
no2=(successes opportunities markets experiences groundswell brands deliverables pipelines goals networking)
egg=(condoms fruitcakes buttocks pickles gerbils camels nipples bananas poodles cubicles)
punchline=""

pn1_e=$[ ( $RANDOM % 10 ) ]
pn2_e=$[ ( $RANDOM % 10 ) ]
mod_e=$[ ( $RANDOM % 8 ) ]
vb1_e=$[ ( $RANDOM % 10 ) ]
vb2_e=$[ ( $RANDOM % 10 ) ]
no1_e=$[ ( $RANDOM % 10 ) ]
no2_e=$[ ( $RANDOM % 10 ) ]
adj_e=$[ ( $RANDOM % 10 ) ]
con_e=$[ ( $RANDOM % 2 ) ]
egg_e=$[ ( $RANDOM % 10 ) ]
ege_e=$[ ( $RANDOM % 20 ) ]
eee_e=$[ ( $RANDOM % 20 ) ]

if [ $ege_e = $eee_e ]
   then
      punchline="${egg[egg_e]}"
   else
      punchline="${no2[no2_e]}"
fi

if [ $con_e = 1 ]
   then
      con=" "
   else
      con=" not "
fi

echo "${pn1[pn1_e]} ${mod[mod_e]}${con}${vb1[vb1_e]} ${no1[no1_e]} $pre ${vb2[vb2_e]} ${pn2[pn2_e]} ${adj[adj_e]} $punchline"

exit 0